You totally make my day, week, month and year. You may be somewhat distracting, but I love the (p)inspiration. Thank you, Pinterest inventors. You rock.
Dear Uncle Clark,
Thanks for taking care of my lawn so I am not the white trash neighbor. The yard looks fantastic. (I’m sure my neighbors, who spend hundreds of dollars on lawn service and have perfectly sculpted shrubbery, appreciate it as well.)
Dear radio stations,
Please stop playing “Call Me Maybe” and “Brokenhearted.” They get stuck in my head and make me want to pull my hair out. Also, anything by Katy Perry can be permanently deleted from your playlists. Thanks.
Dear OPI,
Thank you for creating the shade “Charged Up Cherry.” The bright coral color on my toes is totally making my day right now.
Dear Lo,
Please bring back Lo&Mids. I so enjoyed your creative posts and artsy musings. XO
Dear parents of the overly privileged and arrogant student,
Thank you for calling me a “rotten and unfair teacher,” but I’m not changing the grade your son earned this semester. (Yep, earned, not what I “gave” him.) Tell me, how is it “fair” for me to give your son special treatment, just because you caused a ruckus? Have a wonderful summer, raising your kid who will no doubt end up living in your basement forever because he is in no way equipped to live in the real world without you to call his future professors, bosses, and anyone else who presents adversity in his overindulged life. (Yep, it’s finals week, folks…my least favorite week ever.)
Thank you for always brightening up my day. You’re pretty charming and I think there should be more videos of you on Youtube.
Dear summer,
You can’t come quick enough. I’m countin’ down the hours.